On August 8, 2003, I decided I'd try something new.  A fan of The Simpsons from the get-go, my favourite character was always Homer and I thought I'd share a quote from Homer Simpson every Saturday morning.  Every Saturday morning since August 8, 2003 one of my first tasks was

"Marge, are we Jewish?"

"Because they're stupid, that's why. That's why everybody does everything."

"I don't want to go, so if he asks me to go, I'll just say Yes!"

"I'll teach you to laugh at something that's funny!"

"I dunno what to tell you, Marge! I don't think about things. I mean, I respect those who do, but... I just try and make the day not hurt until I can crawl back in with you."

"I'll make sure you Christian Fundamentalists control everything by the 21st century!"

"We have a great life here in Alaska, and we're never going back to America again!"

"A gun is not a weapon! It's a tool, like a butcher's knife, or a harpoon, or an alligator."

"I think the saddest day of my life was when I realized I could beat my Dad at most things, and Bart experienced that at the age of four."

"In a world gone mad, only a lunatic is truly insane."

"What's keeping Joan Rivers alive?"

"I'm not a genius, or are I?"

"If God didn't want us to eat cows, why are they made out of meat?"

"It's about time trees were good for something, instead of just standing there like jerks!"

"I hope he tells us to burn our pants, these things are driving me nuts."

"Don't you think you're overreacting, talking gum-ball machine?"

"God can't be everywhere, right?"

"Marge, you being a cop makes you the man! Which makes me the woman - and I have no interest in that, besides occasionally wearing the underwear, which as we discussed, is strictly a comfort thing."

"I'm a Spalding Gray in a Rick Dees world."

"And here I am using my own lungs like a sucker."

"Oh, I'm in no condition to drive. Wait a minute. I don’t have to listen to myself. I’m drunk."

"He didn't give you gay, did he? Did he?!"

"You don't win friends with salad."

"Son, a woman is like a beer. They smell good, they look good, you’d step over your own mother just to get one! But you can’t stop at one. You wanna drink another woman!"